Things I Haven't Learned

"I want you" doesn't mean "I like you"; "I like you" doesn't mean "I'll love you"; And "I love you" doesn't seem to mean all that much anymore.

These are things I've learned.

I've also learned that I live for love..
I've learned that I like to be in the company of those I like
I've learned that I can catch feelings quickly..
I've learned that when it comes to relationships I can be insecure due to fear of rejection (although i don't                 know why I'd be rejected..)
I've learned that I feel slighted easily by those I care for
I've learned that when I can't feel love..like just in a moment, Im the saddest I can be
I've learned that i feel a need to be perfect..and I NEVER will be..and it kills me..

Seems like I've learned a lot? But most of it amounts to nothing. "Knowledge without application is useless". See, I know these things, but I don't know...well haven't sufficiently tried to find out how to change the things that need to be changed.

So in the I really haven't learned much.

Okay. So I know what I want you doesn't mean, but what does it mean?  I know I like you may not turn into I love you, but what will i do if it doesn't ? But even if it did, I still don't know what I love you means...at least not coming from others..

Basically, when it comes to love...I haven't learned ANYTHING. Whoever the first person was to say "love is blind" is a genius because it truly is. But it's not just love..."like" is blind too. Sometimes we overlook those red flags because we just want sooo badly to like that person who is (other than that crucial flaw) seemingly perfect! They always seem so perfect in the beginning...smh.

But anywho, that person is me. I can sit and tell u all day what a girl should and shouldn't accept from a guy, what she should and should't do, when she's being dumb, what she needs to do..etc.

But the problem is that I AM that girl, and when it comes to myself....I'm just as dumb as a doorknob 90% of the time.

So. They say the first step to finding a solution is admitting that you have a problem. Well, here. I've admitted it. I know nothing and am stuck trying to comprehend all of the things I haven't learned...

Problem stated. Now I just wait to find the solution..